The thing with the sexual part of BID is that sex is desire, and what one wants for the body is also desire.  So when one sees someone who is as they feel they should be, it triggers one's desire and gets them jealous, wanting to also be as such.  

I wrote about it here in more detail.

https://www.deviantart.com/johnsc2/art/The-sexual-component-of-BIID-1128643250

This is a tough one to negotiate.

The sexual attraction for us I feel begins with puberty. If we can’t be the way we need to, then you do begin to fantasize about being with someone who is. That is how it started with me. I am heterosexual therefore I have fantasies about women who are AK. I would love to experience intimacy as an amputee myself…but I can’t. I felt my only resolve was to meet someone else who is to experience that interaction and that started at about 13 for me.

I don’t think of myself as a Devotee per se, as there is a deviant nature to all of it. I’m not into any of the kinky stuff that goes on with sexual orientation or relationships. I don’t like pornography or sexually explicit material. I don’t even like going into one of those adult stores. 

It was one aspect that I experience, not the only thing. Therapists seem to latch onto this aspect of it with me. It drives me up the wall when they keep prodding me about it. There were also some insulting and inappropriate questions concerning my own explanation about what I felt was actually a beautiful thing. Frustration with one who wouldn’t stop with those types of questions caused me to stop seeking help at first.

Is there a correlation? Definitely. 

I fully agree to the comment of Jason and don’t deny, that there can be a sexual component (it was analysed in studies as well). And let me cite from Johns deviantart-link: “Thinking about being disabled in the way they feel they need is for many desirable.  So that is why many feel that it is sexually desirable as well.” That’s I think is an apt description. But is that, what Jason and John described here, “devotism” at all?

Isn’t devotism a kind of amelotatism? Because I was curious I became member of some platforms where I could find “Amelos”. There seems to be a really huge number of members (more than the BID-community, mostly male and few female), and most of them don’t want to be handicapped themselve and are not BID-sufferers. They get sexually aroused by handicapped people, want to get in contact with them or meet them. Their social behaviour is sometimes – diplomatic spoken – irritating. And what is discussed there has nothing to do with BID at all.

That’s why I think, it is misleading to use the attribute “devotee” in a description of BID at all. It perpetuates an outdated view on BID and we get connected to communities most of us dont want to be part of.

@christof5 I will agree that maybe one who suffers from BID is not necessarily a devotee, but they are sexually aroused by seeing one who is how they want to be.  Desire is desire, and to get what one wants for many is desirable. How great it would be to have been able to achieve what one needs and to get it safely.

Fascinating discussion. According to the ICD-11, if someone wants an impairment only because of sexual reasons, that is not considered Body Integrity Dysphoria.

"If the desire to acquire a disability occurs solely in connection with sexual arousal, Body Integrity Dysphoria should not be diagnosed."

Those cases might fit better under what is called Other Paraphilic Disorder, Involving Solitary Behaviour or Consenting Individuals, but even then, only if the person is distressed by it or harms themselves. Otherwise:

"Atypical patterns of sexual arousal... not associated with distress or risk of injury are not considered to be Paraphilic Disorders."

The DSM-5 takes a slightly different stance and says that paraphilia means any strong sexual interest outside of normal genital sex with consenting, physically typical adults. It also lists things like: "...a highly specific focus on nongenital body parts" (DSM-5, p. 685). Could that include a sexual focus on an amputated stump?

That said, what @johnsco21 wrote is really fascinating:

"Thinking about being disabled in the way they feel they need is for many desirable. So that is why many feel that it is sexually desirable as well."

Sexual desire is more than just physical arousal—it is also about comfort, emotional closeness, and feeling right in your own body. So it is worth asking: if someone lives with a deep, persistent dysphoric feeling about their body, would it not make sense that their fantasies—including sexual ones—might start to centre around what they wish their body was like? In that context, the sexual component is not necessarily about the impairment itself but about the desire to feel aligned and comfortable in one's own skin.

In BID, these emotional and physical layers can overlap. Wanting to be whole or correct in your own body can become part of what feels intimate and desirable. But that does not mean it is a fetish, and it does not automatically fall under the label of paraphilia. Thinking sexually about something does not mean it is only about sex.

There is a big difference between having occasional fantasies or associations that are sexual in nature and having paraphilia in the clinical sense. From this thread, I get that the sexual feelings—if they exist—are a secondary part of a much deeper need that is to feel right in their body.

So, not all BID experiences are sexual, and not all sexual feelings are pathological. However, ignoring this aspect completely would not reflect the whole reality either.

I hope I got the meaning of what is being discussed here. Feel free to point out otherwise.

@leandro, you got it right. I hope that at some point, you can get the medical community to understand BID as well as you do. I feel bad that more people are having to DIY it because it is the only way to get relief.   We seem to have a new person going under the ice almost every month.  Why do they have to take such dangerous means to get what they need?  And yes, they are all happy with their stumps and are free of the dysphoria if they got what they needed.  Such a desirable thing to get what one needs for their body.

I’m new to the forum and I don’t pretend to be an expert—not even when it comes to myself. I feel like I discover something new all the time on this BID journey. I totally value everyone’s opinion and I’m not trying to step on anyone’s toes (pun absolutely intended), but to say someone with BID can’t also be a devotee feels wrong to me.

Two things can both be true, at least in some way. People who are bisexual can find attraction to both sexes; maybe some prefer women more than men, or vice versa, or maybe it’s an equal opportunity depending on the situation. I’ve always felt everyone is somewhat "bisexual" in their attractions, even if there’s no sexual component. I know I’m friends with people I have a certain attraction to. While I’m friendly with many people, when I consider my real inner circle, there is something more than just a shared interest that forms that close bond. It’s a deeper connection, even when it isn't sexual.

While I don’t think of myself as a traditional devotee, I am 100% attracted to female amputees. I honor their beauty. Perhaps it’s just mirroring the body I want and need, or maybe it’s deeper. And for me, a female stump is much more beautiful than a hairy stump on a dude—I often think if I ever become a LAK, I’ll have to get laser hair removal just so I can enjoy my own stump!

I think finding an attraction to someone with a stump or a disability is no different than having a preference for blondes, brown eyes, or any other physical trait. For me, meeting a girl with a stump (AK or DAK) would have been amazing, but that’s only a starting point. Yes, the chemistry might be great for a while, but there is so much more to attraction than just sex. My wife of 30+ years has two legs, and I love her legs. However, I often fantasy about her being a LAK or DAK, but that is only a fantasy. I would never want her to experience that loss and pain, and to be honest, if she had a stump and I didn’t, I would be so jealous.

I know that’s not true of all devotees—some do completely fixate on the missing limb and not the person. I had a friend from my son's Boy Scout troop who was a rehab doctor. He ran the Disabilities Awareness Merit Badge one year, and I remember on a tour he told the boys, "You would never say there's an amputee in room six; instead, you would say there's a patient in room six with an amputation."

I remember so badly wanting to be that patient.

I know there are devotees who see the person first, before the stump. It’s the others who objectify—who see the missing limb as an object—that leave a bad taste in everyone’s mouth. But that’s true of any sexual obsession. For me, when I see a stump, it represents a story. It represents survival, a source of pride, and maybe even accomplishment.

I’ve never been one to stalk amputees online or in person. I’ve never taken a photo or video of an amputee; I may file that image in my brain, but that’s it. I’ve only ever known two female amputees personally: one was an older woman missing a finger, and the other was a friend’s wife who was born a LBE. I felt no sexual attraction to either.

I guess when I see an amputee—female or male—or any person with a disability, I just hope they have love in their life. I hope someone loves them not in spite of the disability, but as a complete person. I want to think they’re adored, not just tolerated. I know that’s how I hope my wife can accept me if I ever become a LAK.

Again, I’m not trying to devalue anyone’s opinions; these are just mine. I’ve been trying to read as many posts on this forum as I can, and I’m truly humbled by everyone's honesty and bravery in sharing. I’ve been in a bad place the last few weeks, and I’m happy I found you all.